Transitions are never pretty,
especially when they involve immature teenagers struggling with the changes
within and around them. This move into
adolescence places their minds and bodies into a confused state and many teens
find it difficult to cope with inner chaos.
Moreover, the uncontrolled streaming
of bizarre teen movies within their circles,
which showcase mean teenagers flaunting their disrespectful attitude towards
parents as totally acceptable and worth the laugh. This leaves our humble teens in a more
perplexed state when instead of been punished these actors get to enjoy the
high life partying and sitting with the cool kids at school.
Therefore the idea gets imprinted
that backtalk is cool, however when they role play the same characters in
real life they face severe resistance and possibly get grounded for misconduct.
As a parent, rearing a child is an everyday challenge. You need to be quick at sorting
issues, and juggle between showing flexibility and marking boundaries. The worst part of parenting starts when you
realize that your child is showing signs of rebellion even at the little things
like managingtime for homework to doing
meagre house chores. Ignoring such trivialities may seem convenient at the time
but it won't look like a good idea once your child’s temper shoots sky high and
you find yourself in a state of shock.
How did things get this far ?
What could trigger such an attitude and what could be
done to curb it?
As good parents it is important that
you try to understand the situation at hand and discuss possible solutions as
opposed to charging at your kid mirroring the same intensity and turning the
whole thing into a shrieking brawl. If
things get bad, a constant unrest will prevail destroying the peace and
serenity of your humble abode.
So the next time you engage with
your teen in an argument and things get
way out of hand remember the following tips to ensure control over raging teen
attitude.
Parenting as an art: How to be better at handling an
aggressive teenager
1. Nip the evil in the bud
Usually parents take their
responsibilities too easy and avoid confrontations to keep matters afloat. It's
true that some things can be bypassed on account of them rarely been repeated
but it's wrong to ignore the signs of aggression shown by your teen to
avoid a one- on-one talk. Every parent
wants their kid to think that they are cool and pretty easy going as opposed to
their own strict parents. But if your child is taking this freedom a step
forward by exercising free will and engaging in frequent arguments at home it's
mostly your fault.
You need to keep a regular check on your teens changing
behaviours, the eye rolls and the constant mumblings can be the first step
towards psychotic outbursts. Take charge at once and before they start spilling
fire tackle the issue tactfully. Initially, they are still afraid to show rage
so urge them to share how they feel, what could be worrying them and resolve
their issues with appropriate solutions.
2. Engage and Diffuse
Once you realize that you took a lot
of time coming to terms with your teens attitude and now he is just like a
raging bull ready to charge, plan your rebuttals. Never jump into the
argument unprepared. Assess your surroundings, weigh your chances of success
and then engage your teen into a sane discussion.
Remember that at this moment, he is
enraged and his sentiments are all over the place. As a teen he doesn't know
how to control this blazing storm and even though he is directing it all at
you, his insides are calling to you for help. He requires your experience and
understanding and it is your duty as a parent to be there for your child.
It's like going into a building
suited up to diffuse a ticking bomb, if you can understand the mechanics you’ll
be able to cut the right wire… if not, boom and everything will blow off the
grid. Therefore understand your child’s situation, you've been
through all this, think from their perspective and work out a suitable
solution.
3. Play your Part
The worst reaction to a child’s
“It’s not fair” and “ Why” is you lunging to the center like a prehistoric ape,
wildly flinging your arms. It's already bad that your child is behaving like an
illiterate buffoon and to worsen the situation, your identical reaction is
bound to turn your living room into a battle ground.
No matter what your child is saying
you need to remember that you are the parent and you will not be infuriated to
react because that is exactly what your child wants. Teenagers need someone to blame their
behaviour on so they have an excuse, “ Ya, I got my temper from my dad”.
Neverlose your calm , never let your emotions get the better of you. In
their perplexed state to give vent to their emotions teens can blurt out
exaggerated comments but you need to understand that they love you. Mere words
cannot mutilate the sacred bond between a parent and a child so only take the
back talk at its surface level without digging for deeper meanings.
Who says it's easy been a parent ? …
But a lot of genuine sweat and toil gets the job done. Sensible parenting is
the key to establishing a healthy environment around the house. Lead by
example… If you want your child to be at their best behaviour, be sure to give
them some role model to look upto.
Can
setting harsh boundaries and exercising aggression win you your child’s
respect? Share your views in the comment box below…
About Author: Jenny Corteza
About Author: Jenny Corteza