When you meet someone new, you can expect
one of two things to happen; either you are going to find common language with
the guy or not. It is never easy starting new relationships from scratch, it is
just so 'awkward'.
The thing people fear the most is not being
accepted by their fellow apes. But doesn't this logic go the other way
around as well. The fact that you are afraid of the other person does not mean
that the other person is not afraid of you. Even if you see them as somewhat
more open and extroverted than you, there is a big possibility that said person
feels even more pressure to put up 'the act' than you do being yourself.
A person is more in love with himself than with anything
else. Try to learn the person's name a as soon as you can. It not only shows
that you are interested in them, but it also shows a certain level of
familiarity and it makes it so much easier going from there.
Addressing people by their first name, unless it is a
business relationship, is sure to bring you some good marks on their behalf as
well. Just remember, aliases are not names. Only if the person asked you
specifically to be addressed by his nick name may you do so. Otherwise it shows
great lack of respect, meaning that you have already lost the battle.
Try to find common interests
If two people live under the same blue sky, it is very
likely that they share at least one thing in common. Don't expect the person to
be particularity interested in you thou. That is why, in order to make some
head way we must pretend to find interest in something they like. Pretending to
be something you are not is a great way to make new acquaintances. Just don't
overdo it or they would know you are lying.
Let the other person talk
Like we have stated earlier, people find their lives
fascinating. Ask as many questions as you can without interrupting their flow
of though. More a person confides in you, more valuable you become to him as
the level of trust rises. Almost every human being on the planet likes talking
about themselves, but if the person is reluctant to share with you, by god
don't push him! This shows that you are either doesn't trust you, or he does
not find you particularly interesting. If that is the case just let it be,
there is no pint in being a bother.
Share interesting things about your life that aren't very
popular
The only way you can seem interesting to others is by
sharing an interesting memory from your past that is both funny and relatable.
Of course no one is asking you to tell them about your divorce or how you came
across a shinny new nickel from you walk to work. It should be something that
not a lot of people have heard about. Like a trip to Guantanamo Bey for
example. If you don't have anything interesting to share, then a little
exaggeration of the truth is always acceptable.
Have Confidence
No one likes a clingy little baby as their friend. Talk with
confidence; have the stones to say what's on your mind, and stick to your act.
You are in control of what's going on.
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About the author:
Jonathan Lewis is professional writer and freelance blogger.
As a regular job he provides cleaning in W1, London. His dream is to graduate
university and become psychologist."
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Tags
Lifestyle