Dealing With Regret: 14 Ways to Move Forward

Our life is an example of wisdom learnt from failures. A life trapped in regrets (past or present) can never move forward.

Would you like to remember your ‘first mistake’ and feel better to know that; you are still making mistakes (smile), or your ‘first regret’, that you should have, could have or would have tried and failed than not trying? Either we feel happy about what we are today and forget the negative feelings behind our mistakes, or we remain stuck in repentances. Learning from life is necessary to move away from regretful memories. Feel happy to learn- what are you today rather than remembering the incidents what you could not be!
I’d rather have a life full of mistakes, than a heart full of regret.
The way practice makes a man perfect; similarly ‘mistakes’ make a man wise. Do not feel guilty for what you could not become. Celebrate your present life and thank God for everything. A heart full of regrets will always carry anger, hatred, jealousy and guilt in the present life; whereas if you learn to forgive yourself and forget every incident that makes you feel apologetic and sorry, you will have control over your future too!
“I am not happy because I have everything and I am everything today; but because I know, I am definitely something which my friends are not.” Embrace what you have in life and you will never ask what others have. Utilize your good qualities and best efforts and one day you will have all that; you always wished for.

A heart that is so heavy with unlikely thoughts can never think clearly, nor can make any good decisions. Confusing and fearful thoughts will rule our mind and we will never be able to unstuck ourselves. Life with regrets is a burdensome life. Find happiness right where you are and with what you are now. Going back to those haunting experiences or embarrassing moments in your early life will always pull you backwards. “I cannot stop looking back at those years and thinking how differently I could have done things. It really should have been the best years of my life, but it turned out to be the worst.” Do you often get stuck with these thoughts?
If we don’t ‘dust off our horns and start tooting again,’ small incidents in our life can really turn into big reasons.

Focus not on what could have been done; rather move forward with the actions that you can do now. Your capabilities are yet to be explored. For ruminating over past aspirations will only bring you unhappiness and depression. Nothing will improve this way; instead your life will be in despair.
I also often dwell in my past. But after I realized it is doing no good for me, I explored best ways to get my mind off those negative thoughts and live a new life. A life full of hope and happiness, a life that will define who I am, rather than what I could not!
I would like to share few things you can practice doing to avoid thinking about past guilt and regrets and live a meaningful positive life:

1.      Forget what has happened and remember what is happening now.
Even if you try, you cannot change that is destined to happen. So feel blessed to know; you still have many more chances to do what you always wanted to do. Go for it! Do not feel bad for what has happened in the past. It was meant to happen.

2.      Feel Happy and Satisfied with your life.
Life is a valuable gift from God and do not waste this life. Even if you do not have everything you wished to possess, you still have achieved many more things which your friends or neighbors may not have.

3.      Create a Passion.
This will keep you busy in your present life.

4.      Stay Motivated.
One of the best ways to give a meaning to your living is by defining your interest and dream, and working towards achieving it.  Your time, thoughts and actions will be so busy fulfilling your dream, that you will not have time to think about the blanks that you could not fill in the past.

5.      Forgive.
Forgiveness is always a tough decision, but definitely a great quality. If you can, apply this quality in need, the results will be so overwhelming.

6.      Laugh often.
Find reasons to giggle and laugh out loud. This is one of the best exercises I practice to keep my negative feelings away from my heart. If I don’t find ways, I simply watch my favorite comedy videos and giggle shamelessly. Trust me! You will feel relaxed and fresh in your thoughts once again.

7.      Live your life your way and not on others terms.
I often tell myself, “I have to do what I always wanted to do. It may take some time, but I really enjoy doing it and that’s what is important.” Believe in yourself. Certain efforts and tasks may take time to reap results, but have patience! Just because you failed in your past, does not mean you will fail again. Do Not Give Up!! Certain decisions may begin with rejections and no support initially, but slowly you will find appreciation and support taking over your effort.

8.      Often Meditate or sit in Silence to learn your Mind.
You know yourself better than anybody. Take some time alone to comprehend what’s going on in your mind. Which thoughts cause you to think regretful?  You can control them by practicing calmness.

9.      Tire your Body to Tire your Mind.
The best ways to tire your mind is by involving yourself in physical activities like; dancing, running, walking, biking or playing sports. Engage all the outlets with your favorite physical activities that allow low and depressing thoughts to come in. Avoid those guilt-ridden thoughts.

10.        Spend Time Looking Good to Feel Good
When you look good and receive wonderful words of appreciation, you are definitely going to feel good. We all love positive comments. The only way to keep them coming in is by spending some more time on your appearance and self-image. Show the world that; ‘you no more live in your past.’ This is a positive approach towards feeling confident and proud about, who you are today! Regrets can rob you of your present life and will end up making you feel depressed and abandoned. Remember!!
  Nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
11.        Be an Imperfectionist.
Nobody is perfect or ever was! Rather it’s good to be an imperfectionist, because you will always have room for learning and becoming making mistakes. Let everyone accept you with mistakes than expecting you to be perfect in everything. This way you can take risks and feel satisfied too!

12.        Understand your anger.
The only way to live a life without regrets is by understanding your anger. Face your fear of failures, guilt and mistakes. Discuss it with someone you trust and let it go. Feeling mad about your failures can take a huge toll on your physical and mental health, because forgiving yourself can be much harder than forgiving someone else. It is normal to constantly feel hurt, vulnerable or angry with those ‘lost’ emotions, but taking control of your anger will make you feel better and help you live a healthier life.

13.        Live a Peaceful Life Than a Purposeful Life.
The only way to lead a peaceful life is- by letting your feelings flow. Do not create ideas and reasons to stop your feeling(s).  Accept that is happening and try to act calmly. You will find a way out to resolve things. Living a life with purpose may be essential, important but peace is more important than anything else. You will know how to get pass through all the obstacles and will be able to relax when you have the ‘right view of life.’

14.         Learn to make mistakes.
Keep your chin up. You are not the only one, who has have made mistakes. Remember those wise words.
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.

Mistakes in your past are just examples of who you are today. You can definitely see the changes, and you will also witness a complete ‘different you’ in few more years. So keep making mistakes. You are learning and sharpening yourself with the best wise qualities.

Untangle yourself and move ahead thinking how wisely you have come this far. Don’t ever wander your thoughts in those dark uneasy moments of life. The only way to think and act clearly is by living a peaceful life with happiness. As I always tell myself, “Have a brave heart to make mistakes.” A life spent in making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing- From Words of Wisdom.

About The Author :    Epsita Mahapatra 

I am an aspiring self-help writer. I love writing on topics like; Motherhood, Parenting, Motivational, Self-Help, Emotions and Relations, Happiness, Change and Challenges. I am not only a believer in Positive Thinking, but also live my life by this formula- “There is always a Possibility to Change, If You Want To Change.” I am on a mission to Change Lives through Understanding and Positive Attitude.

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